"We are all stupid, just on different subjects."
Mark Twain
"It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in an argument."
William Gibbs McAdoo
"Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places."
Entrepreneur E. Joseph Cossman
"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television."
Woody Allen
"Anybody who is popular is bound to be disliked."
Yogi Berra
"Of course I believe in luck. How else to explain the success of those you dislike?
Jean Cocteau
"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one."
Bill Gates
"History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme."
Mark Twain
"Life is like a B movie. You don't want to leave in the middle of it, but you don't want to see it again."
Ted Turner
"Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead."
Benjamin Franklin
"It is a fact of life that any discourse, on any subject, whatever the occasion and whatever the status of the speaker, will always please if it is five minutes shorter than people expect."
Paul Johnson
"A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes."
Mark Twain
"The main trouble with holding elections is that you don't know in advance how they're going to turn out."
Former Hong Kong Governor Lord MacLehose
"The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction has to be credible."
Mark Twain
"Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible."
Humorist Doug Larson
"In times like these, it helps to recall that there have always been times like these."
Paul Harvey
"A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small parcel."
John Ruskin
"If you can fake sincerity, you've got it made."
Movie Magnate Sam Goldwyn
"Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic."
Dan Rather
"People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one."
Leo J. Burke
"I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said."
William F. Buckley
"We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by."
Will Rogers
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."
Oscar Wilde
"Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian."
Humorist Robert Orben
"I am lapidary but not eristic when I use big words."
William F. Buckley
"The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism."
Norman Vincent Peale
"Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress, but I repeat myself."
Mark Twain
"Drinking makes such fools of people , and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony."
Robert Benchley
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